Injured Armitage, wistful Servetus

[ETA: It seems the injured man is not Richard Armitage? That’s great, and I’m relieved. But the general reflection still stands, even without this particular example. Thanks — Servetus.]

Thanks to Bibiana who posted the link in comments to these pictures at TheOneRing.net. If you look through them, you’ll see someone who I’m sure is Richard Armitage. Ears, hairstyle, and build around the hips are all correct. As she hinted, it’s not the nose we’re using to recognize him in these photos — more like the ears. Not exactly smoldering with his back at this point, but a normal guy, walking around a car. I presume he’s been identified definitively as the injured man, somewhere, but feel free to enlighten me in the comments if he’s not. As is probably obvious from the last two posts, I don’t follow the Hobbit stuff very closely.

***

When I was wishing for candid photos, this wasn’t what I meant! Though it’s sort of what I imagine he might wear in his free time on a lazy day — the wrinkled button-front shirt, especially. The right sleeve just a little too long, the palm of his hand caught up in it. Rubbing the index finger of his right hand and his thumb together. A sweet, vulnerable detail.

***

So, yeah. I didn’t repost the picture here, but you all can see what’s on the presumed Mr. Armitage’s left foot — a walking cast / boot. Used for things like stress fractures, sprained ankles, severe tendonitis, and presumably some other troubling ailments. I hope it’s one of the less troubling things. I assume the neon-blue sole on the right shoe is not a style choice, but rather a build-up in order to minimize the ergonomic problems from walking with one hip a few centimeters higher than the other.

Servetus saw this picture and then experienced an intense twinge of sympathy. Poor Armitage. Working hard, so far away from home, and now injured. I’m sure they’re taking good care of him, of course, and he probably has fantastic health insurance, but —

And then, of course, the mind went racing.

Is the real Richard Armitage a wash-and-wear kind of guy who works through the pain? Does he have a choice? Does he like TLC and attention when he’s injured, or does he prefer not to indicate when it hurts, to keep a stiff upper lip and tough it out?

Whatever he needs when he’s injured, whether space or solicitude, I hope he receives it. And may he be healed along with all the sick.

***

I pray a lot. A lot of prayers according to liturgies I learned as a child, a lot of intercessory prayers formulated ad hoc that express a specific intent.

It was the mode of responding to any life event taught to me in my childhood. Happy? Say a prayer of thanks. Angry? Say a prayer that your anger will be abated. Worried? Say a prayer to ask for G-d’s intervention. Afraid? Say a prayer to ask for G-d’s protection. Uncertain? Ask G-d for an answer to your question. Prayer was the primary means of showing concern I learned back then (along with practical support, of course, but we learned in Sunday School that human efforts are pointless without G-d’s willing support and so I believed, back then). My mother has a list of people she’s praying for taped to the dashboard in her car so she can get a few extra prayers in at stoplights. She makes weekly updates. Looking back, I often feel like the insistence that we should pray unceasingly got out of hand. The problems I experienced as a teenager with wondering where G-d is arose in response to a very specific, serious instance of intercessory prayer that didn’t end in the outcome I was praying for. Theologically, I understand the explanation that says that just because G-d doesn’t respond in the way you would like doesn’t mean a prayer has gone unanswered. Personally, it’s a bit hard to take, even if rationally, I know that we cannot all have what we desire, no matter how deep or sincere our petitions.

And then when I went to college, I learned that most people don’t think that it’s the chief end of man to glorify G-d, and that most people don’t express concern for each other by offering their prayers. And I learned that some people think it’s arrogant to pray for people who don’t want to be prayed for. What can it hurt? is the response of the pray-er; but it’s true that the idea that we can impose our wishes, no matter how positively we intend them, on the lives of others, is problematic in all kinds of ways. Better to wish for what other people wish for themselves, than to pray for our own wishes to be realized. I know my mother prays daily for me to see the error of my ways. I try to understand it as an expression of her love for me, even as I realize that, seen theologically, she fears for my eternal damnation — extra Jesum non salus est — or, that seen psychologically, it reflects an inability for her to accept my determination to differentiate, or perhaps, an incapacity to self-differentiate herself.

After a long period without ad hoc intercessory prayer, which mainstream Judaism in the U.S. uses relatively little of, I’ve come back to it. I’ve found I can’t live without it, but recent experiences have taught me that it’s more a psychological mechanism of surrendering to my powerlessness than a means of achieving anything. (Although my friend the Jesuit has been praying for my mother’s healing for the last two years, and while I am sure those are really prayers for me, I also think that they have helped my mother concretely. It’s inconceivable to me that the change in her health could have been so drastic simply due to treatment.) I’ve returned to intercessions with a great deal more vagueness and a great deal more “thy will be done” for myself, and a great deal more generality when I am making them for others. Sometimes I pray for people without telling them — if I know for certain they wouldn’t mind. Sometimes I just say, “I’ll keep you in my thoughts,” but when I say that I really mean that I am praying for them, and I think people who know me realize that. If it’s someone I know is not religious, and I think they might not appreciate being prayed for, though, I say, “May I pray for you?” Because I struggled to self-differentiate myself and don’t want anyone to feel under pressure on that account. Because I don’t want to pray for anyone the way my mother prays for me.

***

Several months ago a fellow fan and friend (I think she’s a friend now — you know who you are — after you read this you can revoke the social contract if you want) asked me whether I prayed for Richard Armitage.

The answer is yes. As of this writing, for a few weeks shy of two years.

(Which raises the question of why his foot is injured!)

I added him to my list, without much thought, sometime during the second week of Armitagemania. I started off praying for him with the same prayer that I say for myself and my family members and close friends, a prayer I’ve been saying since I was little girl, to thank G-d for bringing us to a new day and asking G-d to keep us safe from danger and to bless us by aiding us to act righteously. Later I started asking G-d, if it be G-d’s will, to watch out for Richard Armitage’s health and to bless his endeavors.

I felt a bit queasy about it when I sensed the urge to add him to my intercessions, and felt even stranger, more than a year later, when I felt compelled to admit that I was doing so. My friend told me that at least two groups of people are praying novenas for the cast of The Hobbit, though, and that she knows other people who pray for specific actors.

Admittedly, something about it seems frivolous. As a Jew, I pray daily for a number of divine actions and hoped for occurrences (though, in case you’re curious, I don’t pray for the destruction of heretics — being named after a notorious heretic myself — nor for the restoration of animal sacrifices), and I pray on the Sabbath for things like the stability of our government and blessings upon our leaders, but I, too, wonder if I shouldn’t be praying specific intercessory prayers for the preservation, righteousness, and successes of people who are more important in a cosmic sense than Richard Armitage. Even if I note that Armitage has gone a long distance toward repairing my personal universe and those of a lot of people I know, and even if I assume that G-d has my general good wishes for people who are engaged more directly in tikkun olam in mind, there’s that problem.

Then there’s the issue of whether Richard Armitage wishes himself prayed for. The issue is not — and this is important — whether Armitage wishes he hadn’t injured himself, or hopes for a speedy recovery. Moreover, the issue is not how he would respond publicly were he to know that I, or other people, were praying for him: since it doesn’t involve underpants or pictures of us in bikinis with our phone numbers scrawled over them, I’m sure he’d be unfailingly polite no matter what he thought. The question is, rather, whether it’s legitimate out of ethical concerns to take the position of the other in this particular way. Judaism tends to put the Golden Rule in an interesting way: not “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” or in the Christian formulation, “love your neighbor as yourself” (which admittedly also appears in the Old Testament), but rather, following Rabbi Hillel, “what is hateful to you, do not do to your neighbor.”

So a hypothetical extrapolation (about what another might want) seems to lie at the center of moral thought in the West, but as Skully wrote in an interesting post, taking the position of the other creatively, in play — what she and scholars call intersubjectivity — is also a central component of fantasy. I think this might be one reason why people worry so much about the moral aspects of fantasy — because fantasizing and moral imagination both share the same activity of “taking the position of the other” — as does prayer for those who do not know that we pray for them and cannot be asked. Skully describes the effect of fantasy as having the effect that “subconscious desires can be covertly played out beyond conscious awareness.” In praying for each other, I’ve become increasingly convinced, we need to think seriously about whether aspects of our fantasies don’t transgress these lines. You may say that praying for the conversion of the Jews is not the same as praying for the end of the famine in Somalia, and I think that’s a fair objection, of course. But a lot of moralist intervention justifies itself on the basis that it constitutes something the object of the intervention would want, if he or she were only thinking rationally.

Believe me, I think I know what the line is between thinking about others’ desires when I seek to make an ethical decision, and pretending I know what others’ desires are, either in ethics or in fantasy. I ponder this problem consciously and rationally, too. I have a list of reasons (maybe I’ll publish them one of these days, if I can find a way to make them a bit funnier) why the “real” Richard Armitage and I would not be ideal romantic partners, despite the occasional fantasy that we might be, and the question of religion ranks high on the list. It’s not that I think he’s unethical or irreligious, but I’m a special stripe of religious, I’ve learned, and I don’t know how to change that. Every romantic partner I’ve ever had has been strongly religious, and most of them have had a childhood socialization somewhat like mine (albeit not necessarily as pietist Lutherans). If you want to understand how I think or act, you have to keep in mind that those issues are never very far from my mind. But in my fantasy, Richard Armitage is the kind of man who not only acts decently, which is a pattern that can be observed in reality and makes up a strong part of his appeal — he’s the kind of man who is willing to to be prayed for in the way that I want to pray for him.

I think that’s why I’m wistful when I look at that photo. Of course, I’m distressed for Mr. Armitage and pray for (ethics be damned) his speedy recovery. But as I resolve to do that, I realize that even my prayers for him involve an indulgence of my fantasy of his ethics and my own fantasy of care for him. As I seek to pray for him in the way that I most want to, I realize how little I know about whether, and how, he might be willing to be prayed for. I’m wistful for my own picture of a man who wants to be cared for in the way(s) that I am skilled at caring.

***

I’m still vidding that pesky Guy. Grrrr.

***

Time for some actual, not just fantasy, ethical action:

It’s that time of year again: a point at which we think about the needs of others in the midst of gratitude for the gifts we have received. Here’s a link to Mr. Armitage’s recommended charities at JustGiving and a link to Act!onAid, a child sponsorship organization for which he recorded a voiceover in December 2010. In 2011, Mr. Armitage also participated in fundraising efforts for Christchurch Earthquake Appeal. You can also generate a donation by doing any amazon.co.uk or Book Depository shopping that you do for the holidays via RichardArmitageOnline.com, or amazon.com or amazon.co.uk shopping via RichardArmitageNet.com, as these fansites both donate earned commission to charities that Armitage has endorsed. Fans have also donated in honor of Armitage to Oxfam International.

~ by Servetus on December 8, 2011.

46 Responses to “Injured Armitage, wistful Servetus”

  1. Oh my – my heart stopped beating for a moment!
    I had a closer look (slightly enlarged) at the photo on the left, same guy blue shirt and fawn pants and I dont think it is Richard. Stunt double perhaps?? See what you think ladies.

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    • I agree, I don’t think it is him.

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      • Me neither! Here is my list of things – so far – of things that I think are “off”!!

        1.Beard pattern and colour (too much white)
        2.Side burns (growth begins too far away from the ears)
        3.Ears (wrong shape)
        4.Teeth (not white enough – in fact whole mouth looks wrong)
        5. Shoulders (not wide enough nor as powerful-looking)
        6.”Guns” (too small)
        7.Legs (thighs look much thinner)
        8.”Rear” (not the same shape – as far as I can determine!! ;))
        9.Eyebrows (look thinner and less defined)
        10.The whole physique just isn’t right, IMHO.

        This guy looks smaller than James who is apparently 5′ 11 or thereabouts.

        Re-reading my list I’m wondering if I pay a bit too much attention to what he looks like!!!!!!!!!!! His stunt double or, dare I say, perhaps his brother????

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        • WOW Teuchter!!! I had a “feeling”, but I couldn’t have gone into detail like you have. You have my utmost admiration for your RAnatomy analysis. 🙂

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          • Thanks Mezz!! I wonder if I study this this RAnatomy a little too much!! Don’t remember giving my anatomy lessons at College this much attention or being this interesting. Lol!! 😀

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        • Excellent inventory, Teuchter!
          I agree with you and others–not Richard Armitage.
          Relief! But, of course, we hope whomever the fellow is that he’s on the mend in the meantime.
          Holiday Cheers! Grati ;->

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          • Couldn’t you just hear that collective sigh of relief around the world when we came to the conclusion it wasn’t him, Grati?? But I do join with all of you to wish the poor injured chap a speedy recovery from whatever ails him.

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    • Afer much staring, I don’t think it’s him either. But we will know soon enough.

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  2. When I saw that boot, I could only think of my poor Benny with his two fractures and torn ligaments and feel bad for Richard.
    I hope it is one of the lesser injuries–and it is a good sign he is walking and not using crutches or a cane as Benny had to–and yes, hope and pray for his full and rapid recovery.

    Benny went a week and a half hobbling around, certain it was just a sprained ankle before going to the ER and discovering what was really going on–he may be American, but he can certainly do that whole stiff upper lip stoic number very well. But I liked getting to look after him a bit, I confess, as much as he would let me. Something tells me Richard is the sort to off-handedly say, “Tis but a flesh wound” and go on with it. It did really trouble me to think of him hurting, poor lamb.

    Re prayer, there have been times in my life when I was really struggling, and I knew other people were praying for me, and I could feel the force of that prayer and was grateful for it.

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  3. Looking at it for the umpteenth time, I still don’t think that’s RA in the photo on the left, but it certainly does in the second one, viewed from the back; the shape of his head, ears, the build of his shoulders and hips, and the stride. So, unless RA and someone else decided to dress exactly alike that morning, if it is Richard, the first must be RA as well. I’m hoping someone can confirm this one way or another. Frankly,the suspense of not knowing if he’s really been injured or not makes me a little unsettled.

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  4. Proof it’s not Richard!! Clumsy stunt double?? LOL

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    • I agree with you now Mersguy. On close inspection, comparing a similar profile shot of Richard, the ears are definitely different. Whatever that upper rim of the ear is called, Richard’s is underdeveloped, this man’s ear has a more rolled over rim. Plus, that is one strange beard he has, all around the chin but not right up to the lower lip. Somehow I don’t think RA would wear a beard like that.
      But….he could be Richard’s stunt double,’cos he certainly looks like him from the rear, which would be necessary, one would think.
      🙂 I feel happier now!!!

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      • I studied the ears which do seem different, and something about the jaw. There is such a strong resemblance, however, he surely must be RA’s stunt double. With hair, costume and makeup it would be hard to tell the difference from certain angles, that is for sure.

        I couldn’t fail to notice a lot of those guys shown in the pictures have such–diminuitive noses. At least this fellow has a proper aquiline nose. 🙂 I am afraid RA’s nose has spoiled me in regards to appreciating those itty-bitty “hooters” on men.

        Whilst I am mightily relieved to think it probably isn’t RA, my sympathy still goes to this chap. He’s working hard, too, I am sure, and I hope he heals soon.

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      • what can I say …trust me!!

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  5. So here is a question. Knowing it isn’t Richard, does everyone still extend the same level of heartfelt concern to this unfortunate random guy?

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    • I think I just answered that one. 😉

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      • Good for you Angie! I’m sure my own reaction is far more cold than you would expect (or maybe not if you knew me *shrug*).

        When I saw the pic in small size (on my cell phone no less) I was certainly wondering if it was him. My initial thought was “Wonder how he did that, and what a story this will be for the behind the scenes extras”. I’m remembering how Viggo Mortensen injured himself while filming a scene on LOTR (which they left in) thus proving how amazingly dedicated to the work he was. But when I checked out the larger version (always click the pic, ya never know how big it will go) all those details Teuchter mentioned helped ID him. So then my feeling was “Oh good, at least filming won’t be impacted.”

        Really I am heartless.

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        • I am sure in sunnier times health-wise I might not have given much thought to Mr. X.

          But being unemployed and laid up and dealing with a chronic illness on top of everything else has had the interesting effect of making me “feel others’ pain” more than I;m sure I would otherwise. Go figure.

          Let’s say I have had a LOT of time to think lately. 😉

          And that I sincerely hope Richard doesn’t get hurt–or anybody else. It’s absolutely no fun being all banged up.

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    • Guilty as charged!! 😦 Concerned certainly, but not QUITE on the same level as I am so relieved to think Richard isn’t injured!

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      • I guess in my case, between my husband breaking his leg a few months ago and me injuring my back in that stupid car accident a few weeks ago, I feel especially empathic to anyone suffering an injury, Of course I am glad it’s not Richard, but I will still send up a prayer for Mr. X., too. Goodwill towards all men. Drinking of the milk of human kindness. ‘Tis the season . . . 😀

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    • 😦 Guilty as charged too! My relief it isn’t Richard injured over rode all else.

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    • Very remiss of me, where are my manners!
      Yes wishing you (mystery man) a speedy recovery.

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    • Love your piece on the defense of Thorin Oakenshield. The character is in safe hands with Richard.

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  6. I’m sure that’s not him! If you look at a guy’s profile and think it reminds you of RA but are not sure, it cannot be him. From other angles it might be hard to tell, but the profile should be unmistakable! I’m not very worried for this guy because he seems to be walking normally, not with a limb, and looks happy talking and laughing with others. Even if it were RA, there would still be a lot of stuff he could do acting-wise.

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  7. I was surprised when everyone thought it was Richard. Understandable though – we are longing for pics – any pics! 🙂

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  8. Servetus, re prayer. I am an atheist and when people I know who have a religious faith say to me that they will mention me in their prayers I just thank them. They mean it sincerely and I respect that.

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    • Yeah, I think of it as people extending their good will to me in ways that are meaningful to them, which is lovely. Whether or not we share the same ideas about God or theology or any of the stuff that goes with it, I think of it as a tender offering to be accepted with pleasure.

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  9. I should probably give up trying to write or answer comments during finals 🙂

    A sammelsurium of replies:

    -I had only seen the rear picture. Now that I’ve seen the front one I agree it’s obviously not him. What’s weird though is that he’s doing something with his right hand that Armitage also does.

    -Would I pray for the injured man? I already have. The Jewish form of the prayer is “may he be healed along with all the sick,” so we ask for intercessions for those we care about but also for those who are not known to us personally in the same breath. (In Judaism you pray for the intercessee as child of his / her mother, so since we know his mother’s first name it is easy to say that prayer for him.) So yes, I am praying for the injured man, too, as I pray for anyone else who’s sick with that prayer. Since the man is not the object of my fantasy (see second part of post), however, I wouldn’t worry so much about the correspondence of my prayers for him to his own desires for himself. I’m not worried that I’m somehow constituting an imagined self for him with my prayers.

    -I think that the feeling of being willing to accept the prayers of others as a positive sentiment is contingent upon the assumption that they will pray for something that you yourself wish. I can only repeat that if you know people are praying for something for you that you yourself don’t want, it’s a disturbing experience. (This may be a point that’s more acute for members of minority religions.) What I’m trying to underline here is not that my prayers for Richard Armitage would differ substantially in this case from what he wants — though I can think of cases where they might, if my prayers were for more exact or for less impersonal things: what if I prayed for him to receive a role he doesn’t want, for example? — but rather that my desire to pray for him in the way that I do is contingent upon my own fantasy. I apologize if this point was not clear.

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    • 1. That prayer is lovely, and it reminds me of “may all beings be free from suffering and from the causes of suffering”; a warm, generous recognition that although a particular person or persons might be the immediate focus of our prayers, it is in extending our compassion and good will to all that we truly embrace healing (which seems to me, from this etymology, to be very much the same as the definition I’ve been given of shalom).

      2. I’ve been “prayed for” by people who weren’t “praying for me” in any way I recognised as being prayer, but assaulting me by using prayer as a camouflage, and it was distressing.

      For me, prayer isn’t a laundry list of demands you present to the Divine, it’s a communication – and petitioning the Divine that someone just be made more acceptable to me is not real communication but active stopping my ears to any response. As my grandmother would have it, “How can folk expect to hear God if they spend all their time and energy telling Him what THEY want instead of listening for what He has to say?”

      I’ve come to believe that if someone thinks that they can pray away some part of my personhood and so whip me into a form acceptable to them (and it’s amazing how unacceptable I can be once people get over my ordinariness), then they are holding up the fragility of their sense of self and of their faith to all and sundry, which strikes me as sad rather than threatening. Now it elicits feelings of sorrow and concern for them rather than anger and distress. It’s taken years for that to stop just being my intellectual position and become how I really feel when put in that position.

      Last time someone used “praying for me” as a threat against me, I was taken off balance for a moment, and then I realised how much fear there was behind that angry, brittle, self-righteous front, and I found myself saying with genuine warmth, “Thank you – and I will pray for you”. I suppose that when people talk about offering prayers on my behalf, I trust that the Divine is not a simple vending machine; and I no longer worry about the worst possibilities, but hope that they may find themselves open to the possibility of feeling, then extending, some genuine good will.

      In my religious community, it’s common to hear prayers for someone else rounded off by the formula “in accordance with his/her/their highest Will and highest Good” or “in accordance with the highest good of all”.

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      • I’m so sorry that happened to you, Karen. Religious coersion is like any other form of emotional coersion, whether it’s a snide “Well, I’ll pray for you” when you disagree with someone or taking scripture out of context to try to prove a point. I think your point starting with “then they are holding up…” really cuts to the heart of the issue.

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        • Well, we can’t fix other people’s insecurities and bad behaviours. All we can do is own up to our own and take responsibility for our behaviour, which is a lifetime’s work in itself!

          This “being a grown up” lark is sometimes a bit of a slog, and yet I keep trying 🙂

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      • Karen, thanks for this impressive paragraph that articulates to me the things I’ve found troublesome in so much prayer. It was nice to read my reactions legitimated.

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  10. Servetus, perhaps it consoles you, I pray for him as well ;o) Never in an outcome-like way, but always according to the wishes G*d has for this certain person. I never ask for permission or mention it, I even pray for an atheist in my family, though I do not especially like him (not that he finds religion, that is only up to G*d, if he wants to grant this relief in life). For another person in my family I do not pray, though he would be a much closer relation to me, I just ignore this person, what in my view is the worst I can do to someone I do not respect.
    I do even pray for a certain project of RA (hard to guess which ;o), though even here I do not pray for a result or even that it is realised. I just pray that it will have the best possible result for him.
    After this year’s developments I am very humbled to try and pray for a result, which I always hesitated to do. But after developments which looked bad on the outside, but were the best ever rescue method, while I prayed during the whole year to be rescued from, how could I ever again argue with G*d to do something I want. He is great in whatever he does and his ends will justify his actions.

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    • When I was really in crisis in the last yearsI prayed “thy will be done” a lot — I didn’t feel capable of asking for anything for myself. Maybe praying for what the person wishes to come to fruition to do so in G-d’s keeping is the way to go.

      Agree with you on the issue of G-d’s plan justifying G-d’s actions.

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  11. I’m trying to absorb the content of your post Servitus. I think your reflections on intercessory prayer are very valuable but I need to think more about how it ties in with being a fan of Richard Armitage who after all is a complete stranger for most of us and doesn’t ask for all this attention.

    Hope all is well with you xo

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    • Thanks, mulubinba, good to hear from you. It was kind of my point that I pray for him but I’m hazy on whether that’s a good idea — praying for someone I’ve created in my fantasy. Sorry if that wasn’t clear.

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  12. […] but meanwhile, won’t you take the time to act as someone else’s redemption today? I’m always for prayer, and, as the video points out there are plenty of ways to act in love without spending money. […]

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  13. Dwarf sighting! RA sighting! Maybe. Maybe not. (But the gentleman has mentioned weak ankles…)

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  14. We create lots of positive energy. Good vibes(prayers) must help him somewhat:)

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  15. […] even shake my hand or have the guts to look me in the face when he spurns it will ever clarify. Because my mother is still praying for my conversion back and I know this because she tells me before every church service we attend together. Because my […]

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  16. […] of my attraction — having been faithful followers and supporters and cheerleaders and prayers and hopers, and wondering how it is going to affect us. Will fans “matter” to Armitage […]

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  17. […] had a discussion here some time ago about the ethics of praying for Richard Armitage — something a fair number of us do, apparently, given the Richard Armitage confession above. […]

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