BREAKING: Audible announces Richard Armitage’s next audiobook
Audible Studios, a production arm of Audible.com, today announced the release of beloved stage and screen actor Richard Armitage’s next audiobook, quickly on the heels of audience favorites David Copperfield and The Turn of the Screw (2016). This impassioned performance by the star of Hannibal and The Hobbit will be available for download shortly.
In addition to his impressive television and film resume, Armitage is a renowned and polished audiobook narrator, nominated three times for Audie Awards: for Classic Love Poems (2015); for Hamlet, Prince of Denmark: A Novel (2014); and for Venetia (2011). Audible anticipates a further nomination for David Copperfield.
Asked about the new project, Reid Armbruster, Audible’s director of social media, stated, “We are pleased to be developing our relationship with Richard Armitage after the massive audience response to his audiobooks so far. It gives us particular pleasure to be able to supply Armitage’s fans with an audiobook version of a text that they assure us practically every week that they would be pleased to purchase.”
“The telephone book is likely to be tremendously popular, based on the the level of enthusiasm to hear Richard reading the phone book expressed in tweets,” said Audible EVP and publisher Beth Anderson. “With every recording, we strive to identify the perfect match of text and actor, and we think listeners will agree that Richard Armitage and the phone book is that ideal pairing. Fans of Richard’s television and film work are going to love spending time at the gym or in the car as he reads them the names and numbers of random people no one’s ever heard of. In particular, the long pages of Rodriguezes, Schmidts, Huangs and Johnsons should make for particularly exciting narration!”
Fans speculated that Armitage, well-known for the intensity with which he researches every role and project, would get particularly involved in this one.
“Given the fact that the phone book practically doesn’t exist anymore,” commented an under-employed former history professor and blogger in Wisconsin, “just assembling a reliable text to read that actually included the entire phone book in a list form might be a significant challenge. Or,” she continued, “he could just read it off the Internet.”
However, a picture circulating on social media seemed to support the possibility that Armitage had already completed the recording process for the book.
The entertainment press was eager to discover more about the new project. After a fruitless search in Berlin, our intrepid reporter located Richard Armitage on the summit of Cardón on Fuerteventura. “There’s no snow. No skiing. Why can’t we film this damn thing in Austria?” he was heard to be grumbling when she scrambled up the slope after him.
Sensing his impatience, the reporter asked him a burning question: “Given your interest in finding an individual voice for EVERY SINGLE CHARACTER in a cast of thousands in David Copperfield, will you also individualize all the names in the Manhattan white pages for Audible? Or will you go for the safer approach of a single voice for each family name?”
At first, Armitage did not answer. Then he opened his mouth and yelled:
April Fool!
Happy April Fools’ Day to Richard Armitage, audible.com, and all of Armitage’s fans.
muffled laughter
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alyssabethancourt said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:38 am |
Happy April Fool’s day!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:22 am |
This was the greatest, i was rolling………Thank You!
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Anne said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:39 am |
thanks for reading!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:24 am |
😂😂😂😂😂
I LOVE IT!!!!
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LadyGrayse said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:39 am |
That’s what Audible is hoping! Once Armitage does it, they can probably get Hiddleston to do it next.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:25 am |
Oh, Hiddleston is another one I can listen to all day long. Shh!!! Don’t tell Richard.
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LadyGrayse said this on April 1, 2016 at 10:47 pm |
Very entertaining! Thanks for the smile.
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richardtreehouse said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:59 am |
Thanks for smiling 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:26 am |
cackling Next up–random people’s grocery lists. 😉 I love it, thank you! 😀
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fedoralady said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:59 am |
Tweet it at Google and see what they say 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:21 am |
I’m going to cross my fingers for the Armitage on Audible version of the 1040 tax booklet next year. I’d pay double to listen to him read It. I might even understand is me of the finer nuances of the math problems if he did. Just saying.
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RAmused said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:03 am |
There’ll be an economy 1040-EZ version and then a surcharge if you want him to read and explain Schedule A of the regular 1040.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:21 am |
I’ll probably pay that surcharge. He might have to explain it to me several times.
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RAmused said this on April 2, 2016 at 2:48 am |
The IRS can use it as a fundraiser. Oh, wait.
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:11 am |
LOL. Can’t wait to hear it. I hear the ending is inspired. 🙂
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Kathy Jones said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:04 am |
It’s like an extreme version of Edwin Drood — every one ends differently 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:20 am |
Damn! I was just about to go see if it was on pre-order!
The phone number on the paper is a nice touch. 😉 Love it!
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kellyduck said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:18 am |
Audible is still figuring out how to price a book that’s 700 hours long 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:20 am |
$500…..or one credit. 😉
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kellyduck said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:34 am |
free with new membership?
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:13 pm |
Thank you for the chuckle. Or as my husband just asked, Why are you cackling? You had me going at first.
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valsgal1999 said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:14 am |
We all want a new audiobook!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:28 pm |
😆😆
Thanks!
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Valentina said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:14 am |
🙂 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:28 pm |
I have long waited for this particular announcement. So glad it is finally coming. At least we now know what his next project is. Will do wonders for his pale British teint (given that he won’t see the light of day for months, during recording).
😎
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Guylty said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:22 am |
That’s a great point. Audiobook performances as skin cancer prophylaxis.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:28 pm |
Well played ma’am, well played. 🙂
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judiang said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:26 am |
Thank you!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:29 pm |
Ha, da fehlte mir bereits nach den ersten Jubelsätzen der gewohnte Quellenhinweis und spätestens beim Stichwort Telefonbuch habe ich es kapiert 😜 Dir auch einen schönen “April, April! ”
Kleiner Querverweis: das Telefonbuch wurde bereits vor 30 Jahren auch schon mal literarisch rezensiert. Einer meinere Lieblingsklassiker von Loriot http://youtu.be/NEZtmUxCTO4 Eine Audioversion ist also ohne weiteres denkbar. 😂
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CraMERRY said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:29 am |
I did not know that sketch — thanks!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:29 pm |
Herzlichen Dank dafür – Loriot macht einfach gute Laune! 🙂
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Elanor said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:40 pm |
Hahaha! Excellent post Serv! 😂😂😂
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suse3 said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:37 am |
🙂 🙂 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:20 pm |
You had me going there as I didn’t notice the numbers on the page! 😦 Who looks at numbers when he’s in the gif? Absolutely priceless though 😀
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Teuchter said this on April 1, 2016 at 7:44 am |
For a good time, call ….
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:23 pm |
Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant! 😂 You had me completely for the first three paras! Thanks for making my morning!
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Helen said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:02 am |
I’m glad the joke worked at least for some! The first 2 paras are closely modeled on actual Audible.com press releases — the only way to make this joke work was to bury the title of the “new” audiobook as long as possible.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:25 pm |
Großartig – Lol! Thanks 🙂
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suzy said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:05 am |
Thank Armitage — he’s the one who’s reading “Schmidt, Anne, Schmidt, Betty, Schmidt, Christina, Schmidt, Christine,” after all …
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:26 pm |
Oh, you XD But mind you: I would buy that stuff! XD
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aquileaofthelonelymountain said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:33 am |
I think you’re not the only one!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:26 pm |
Reblogged this on Aquilea of the Lonely Mountain.
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aquileaofthelonelymountain said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:33 am |
Ok this piece is superb Ms Servetus, I was completely convinced and eagerly scanning ahead for the new “title”. And enough to convince me to step out of my second round of lurkerdom. Well written! 🙂
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asteraurora said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:34 am |
we all want to know! Thanks for coming out of hiding!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:27 pm |
Best. Ever.
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Gracie Macgregor said this on April 1, 2016 at 9:01 am |
Next: Richard Armitage with koalas. Film at 10.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:28 pm |
great April Fool’s story
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bloodangel said this on April 1, 2016 at 10:00 am |
Thank you!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:29 pm |
See, I would soooooo purchase this anyway!!! LOL! Happy April Fools.
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zeesmuse said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:19 am |
We can suggest it to him if the Hobbit royalty money ever runs out.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:29 pm |
Perhaps we should suggest it to him. I remember a few years ago reading where you actually could get a celebrity to record your voice mail message. Maybe he’d do it for charity.
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LadyGrayse said this on April 1, 2016 at 10:53 pm |
Lol … I read the first paragraph or so trying to work out what the title was. I’m an April Foll indeed!
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Mulubinba said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:27 am |
yeah, a real release would have put the title in the first sentence. But then the joke would have been over immediately. Happy April Fools!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:30 pm |
Somebody else already tried to prank me this a.m. so I was all over it…. they would probably sell pretty well though 😂😂😂
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SHeRA said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:51 am |
One of the Tolkien bloggers got it really badly yesterday — published a report that WB and Jackson were planning to do another film based on the LOTR appendices or something. To the point that when I read it, I thought HE was April Fooling his readers — until about about four hours later, he published a second post saying that he’d deleted the earlier one. I felt bad for him, but that’s how April Fools works, you play on the target’s desire to believe something is true.
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:31 pm |
Reblogged this on Well, There You Go … and commented:
Get yours now!
giggle
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zan, O1C said this on April 1, 2016 at 1:37 pm |
They should be available … shortly …. 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:32 pm |
It took me a minute , …. I would love to hear him read the phone book ,….. Id be all a quiver as he got to my name and number .!..BRILLIENT SERVETUS made me laugh out loud xx
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jane said this on April 1, 2016 at 2:31 pm |
I think we could crowdfund it that way … who wouldn’t pay a little bit to hear him read your name and number?
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:34 pm |
Thankyou .I was taken in , maybe we should tell Richard there is a money maker here , reciting the phone book ! Made my day , keep armitaging xxx
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Jane Miller said this on April 1, 2016 at 2:35 pm |
Too freaking funny. And dangerous to have a drink in hand when one gets to the photo down below! NOW I see why Audible didn’t include RA in their little prank (which is actually downloadable- I did it!). Who needs him to narrate the Encyclopedia Britannica when he’s already committed himself to the phone book?
https://www.audible.com/mt/AF2016/?serial=&source_code=AUDOREM0325169GNU
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jholland said this on April 1, 2016 at 3:26 pm |
oh, wow, I didn’t check to see if they had their own joke. Ah well 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:34 pm |
Good one! You had me for a second or two.
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Linlou said this on April 1, 2016 at 3:27 pm |
it only takes a second 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:37 pm |
hahahaha I love you
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mrsjohnstandring said this on April 1, 2016 at 4:22 pm |
smooches 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:37 pm |
great
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Bila Halperin said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:41 pm |
Thanks for the comment and welcome!
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:38 pm |
Natürlich habe ich zuerst nicht auf das Datum geachtet, aber mal ehrlich – das Telefonbuch…
Danke für das breite Grinsen in meinem Gesicht. Das kann ich heute sehr gut gebrauchen. 🙂
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Elanor said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:43 pm |
We think this is a tremendous use of Armitage’s amazing talents 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:38 pm |
LOLOLOLOLOL! Very clever and fun! 😊
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Buffy Brinkley said this on April 1, 2016 at 5:45 pm |
What will that man do next?
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Servetus said this on April 1, 2016 at 6:39 pm |
I dunno, but it’d be nice to hear his voice giving me directions in my car on the navigator system… I might go in circles on purpose just to hear the reprimands that would have to be made on account of my ridiculous driving 🙂
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D said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:00 pm |
Yes! I’d rather hear him than Siri anyday!
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Chazak said this on April 2, 2016 at 1:04 am |
I’m hoping he plays Matthew Clairmont. ❤️
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Buffy Brinkley said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:59 pm |
Yeah, I’ve thought about that too… for some reason I picture that character a little shorter than Richard- maybe it’s the wolf references, and I think of a wolf as a stockier creature. I like Emily Blunt for the witch. And maybe Sean Connery (a younger one) for Matthew’s father.
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D said this on April 2, 2016 at 12:00 am |
That was priceless! roflmao
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Andrea Númellóte said this on April 1, 2016 at 8:24 pm |
Thanks 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:26 am |
You are the best , Serv. The photo is perfect.
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Babette said this on April 1, 2016 at 10:56 pm |
Thanks. I could have created a spliced together tape of him reading those numbers, but I figured it wouldn’t compete with him actually singing the song …
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:26 am |
So much fun! I would fast forward to him reading my name and number.
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LostinaGoodbook said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:21 pm |
that’s a good point. One wouldn’t have to listen to the whole thing.
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:25 am |
OMG! You made my day! Best April Fool ever! You really had me going for a bit.😉😄
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phylly3 said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:34 pm |
Nice to see you again!
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:22 am |
😜
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Mermaid said this on April 1, 2016 at 11:44 pm |
🙂
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:24 am |
Oh, I must really be beyond tired. You had me going for quite awhile, until the actual words “telephone book” hit me between the word “sucker” on my forehead! This year, I thought that the April Fool’s jokes were sparse…only to be graced with one here! And, an extra chuckle for the phone number. ..now I’ve got that one-hit-wonder stuck in my head! 😆😬
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Chazak said this on April 2, 2016 at 1:03 am |
Gmail brought out and then disabled its joke before I even had time to see it …
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:24 am |
All I can think of when you do these type of things is a gleeful smirk and the last part of the quote from Shakespeare: By the pricking of my thumb/ something wicked this way comes. 🙂
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Irish Witch said this on April 2, 2016 at 2:16 am |
Definitely comes from a wicked impulse that I have to work to keep under wraps 🙂
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 4:23 am |
I did find some Hiddlestone doing the weather in Chicago.
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valsgal1999 said this on April 2, 2016 at 5:28 am |
I saw that, too. VERY cute.
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Servetus said this on April 2, 2016 at 5:31 am |
Love it! You really had me going. And, coincidentally, I just posted a remark that Richard could read the phone book and make it sound exciting. 😀
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jeanniegisborne said this on April 7, 2016 at 5:40 am |
You don’t say 🙂 I’ll let you know when pre-orders are available.
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Servetus said this on April 7, 2016 at 5:41 am |
Looking forward to it! 😉
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jeanniegisborne said this on April 8, 2016 at 3:07 am |
[…] “BREAKING: Audible announces Richard Armitage’s next audiobook,” April 1, 2016. Annual April Fool’s Day […]
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2016 at “me + richard armitage” in review | Me + Richard Armitage said this on January 3, 2017 at 11:28 pm |
[…] Attractive because: fans constantly ask him to do it and because it feeds into a rumored project. […]
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[…] kiss the vampire, however, will lose the level and must sit out for five minutes while listening to Armitage’s narration of the Manhattan phone directory before they can attempt to kiss the avatar […]
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[…] but doubt now that I’ll ever be able to finish it.) I’m not in the group of people who’d pay to hear him read the phone book, and honestly, 2018 was rough on me just because there was so little visual output. I know there […]
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